This song is about how I feel when looking back over my day that I waste away and the frustration of feeling hopeless to change
Progressive finger-style guitar, with emotional melodies and raw, honest lyrics.
I invite you to amble through my world of raw, emotional and honest song writing.
I hope it might strike a chord in you and be a little more like a flower among the thorns of unsigned amateurs here on SoundClick. Though I indeed am a unsigned amateur myself.
Lyrics
"I know how destructive it is to please my flesh, And I know the joy and the freedom I have when I focus on You.
Yet I let my feeling, emotions, and moods drag me down, Later I wonder where was my faithfulness to stand firm in what I believe
I began to worry about the next time I don’t feel like trying, When an apathy comes over me, and I don’t seem to care about what I believe,
For my soul is fatigued and I can’t seem to think.
It is during these time I feel the weakest,
It is during these time it seems You are the farthest away.
I don’t find the strength to changed so I pray for help. But no help I find, so by the act of the will I try, But how often I fall victim to how I feel. It’s during these times I feel I need You the most But Your nowhere to be found,
I just want to crawl in to a hole in the ground and cry But no tears can I find,
Yet it’s ripping my heart out And holding it right in front of my eyes.
Every time you open my eyes to a new revelation,
it’s always followed with this feeling, like a spiritual hangover that comes over me casting me to my knees. Is this your way of humbling me, an infirmity that you have given me, yes a gift to help me to grow, and keep me fully dependent on you?
Lord I confess that your way is the best,
your timing is perfect, so are you putting me to the test, so that I’ll grow strong, for feelings will come and go, you want my faith to be tested and real.
Yet the night always comes, where I look over my day and see what I have done, then shame covers my face how could I live my life this way?
I cause myself so much pain! I hate myself sometimes,
it seems I’ll never learn, for I’m only getting worse.
The very way I condemn is the way I live, I’m a two faced humanistic worm.
Lord is there any hope, can a leopard change his spots?
O how my life is in your hands. So have mercy, for I’m filthy,
have mercy for I’m blind, have mercy for I’m helpless and weak,
humanistic and sinful, so have mercy.
