Worm Quartet
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Kim Kardashian Kim Kardashian
My wife was walking around the house singing this, and I decided it needed to be a song, so I made it one.
5/1/2012 Comedy
The Laundromat of Sin The Laundromat of Sin
A techno-pop-metal treatise on religion, politics, sex, pop culture, and throat lozenges. Oh so many throat lozenges. Contains what is, without a doubt, the best sing-along chorus I've ever written, and a cameo by Luke Ski.
5/1/2012 Comedy
The Ballad of Dr. Stopp The Ballad of Dr. Stopp
A celtic synth-rock ode to my vasectomy. Based on a true story - the b*** iness of my wife has been exaggerated for comedy purposes.
5/1/2012 Comedy
What Your Parents Think All Your Music Sounds Like What Your Parents Think All Your Music Sounds Like
The most evil song Worm Quartet has ever created. Recorded live with Shoebox in his full mullet-swinging glory at Monty's Krown in Rochester, NY.
6/13/2007 Comedy - Adult
C Is For Lettuce C Is For Lettuce
Worm Quartet's reaction to the neutering of the Cookie Monster (i.e. 'C Is For Cookie' and 'A Cookie Is A Sometime Food') and what it says about how parents like to deflect their responsibilities.
2/5/2007 Comedy - Political Humor
I Don't Give A Sht About Your Website - 2006 Mix I Don't Give A Sh*t About Your Website - 2006 Mix
Inspired by the plethora of crappy websites out there - 90% of every website on the Internet that isn't porn is pictures of people and their friggin' cats. Is this really necessary?
2/15/2006 Comedy
I Still Know You're A Fish I Still Know You're A Fish
A cover of Tony Goldmark's immortal children's song "I Know You're A Fish," updated with a choral goth ska punk metal whatever kinda whatsit to make it sound like, well, Worm Quartet. The Great Luke Ski appears as the Judge.
2/15/2006 Comedy
Hair On The Soap - 2006 Mix Hair On The Soap - 2006 Mix
A technoriffic ode to a former roommate's mullet droppings. From the Sumophobia remix album, Sumophobia Alpha 2 EX Super Championship Turbo Edition
2/14/2006 Comedy
Inner Voice (with Sudden Death) Inner Voice (with Sudden Death)
My first-ever collaboration with rap dementia semi-legend Sudden Death! A schizophrenic success story.
2/11/2005 Comedy
I'm Gonna Procreate I'm Gonna Procreate
Bunches of people have expressed to me their fears that I may somehow breed. This is my response. "A f***ing brilliant piece of work IMHO...may be comedy music's best-ever song about the urge for reproduction." - Dr. Demento
3/27/2004 Comedy
Wookiee Weeniee Wookiee Weeniee
Everybody must have wondered this about Chewbacca at some point in their life...Another song in the "Short Bus Suite."
1/17/2004 Comedy
Dead Fragglz Dead Fragglz
A loving tender far-too-Ramonesesque punk epic discussing the various places in which one might find a deceased puppet. A relic from back when I had a band...features Kevin Morgan on guitars and Ben Dean programming the drums. Remastered!
2/15/2006 Comedy
The Rabbit Song The Rabbit Song
This is a song about rabbits and why they're so great.
1/17/2004 Comedy
Coffee (2003 Grind) Coffee (2003 Grind)
A rant about cubicle life tempered with praise for the one substance worth abusing when coping with it. Punky and fun. This is a new re-recorded version of my favorite song from "Sumophobia."
1/17/2004 Comedy
Pac-Man Is Naked And So Should You Pac-Man Is Naked And So Should You
An incredibly stupid song about the blessed yellow maze-dwelling ghost eater who brings me such joy.
1/17/2004 Comedy
Getting Shot In The Face Sucks Getting Shot In The Face Sucks
Part of the 17-song 4-and-a-half-minute "Short Bus Suite." I figure everyone can relate to this one.
1/17/2004 Punk
Dear God Dear God
A nice little ditty about asking God to protect you from EVERYTHING...from sex-crazed robots to mutating bodily secretions! Inspired by people who think thay can sit on their asses and an invisible man in the sky will solve all their problems.
1/17/2004 Comedy
Great Idea For A Song Great Idea For A Song
The ultimate Worm Quartet ex-girlfriend song.
1/17/2004 Comedy
Frank's Not In The Band Anymore Frank's Not In The Band Anymore
Worm Quartet's greatest hit...the second most requested song of 2002 on the Dr. Demento show. A twisted tale of a drummer who refuses to leave a band.
1/17/2004 Comedy
