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Song Info
Genre
Charts
#132,763 today
Peak #1,003
#82,262 in subgenre
Peak #580
Author
JoeMalo
Uploaded
September 07, 2005
Track Files
MP3
MP3 3.4 MB • 128 kbps • 0:00
Story behind the song
Ever wonder what it would be like to put the barrel of a gun to your head and pull the trigger??? Here's a glimpse into that world.
Lyrics
Sitting in the dark, reflection of a stranger
contemplating a single round in the chamber,
Hand shaking, sweat, steady drip, drip
.38 cold metal, hand on a rubber grip
fingertips curled tight to a hair trigger
breathing slow, staring at the dirty floor
of a musty ass motel, showers going
A/C’s off but the fans still blowing
Beds sheets crumpled up, pillows on the dresser top
Cocked that hammer back, listen as the hammer locked
half bottle of rum and an empty pack of cigarettes
.38 barrel against the side of my fitted cap
should I or I should not
heaven aint ready for me, Hells too hot
ready or not, take look inside
into the scene of a m-f- suicide
be a witness to a m-f suicide
hammer fell, click, waiting for the loud pop
took a deep breath, let the .38 drop
lay back on the bed, head spinnin’ slowly
wondering what god was trying to show me
when all my life I been hustling to get by
why would he not want me to die
so I, grabbed that .38 let the cycle spin
placed that cold barrel back to my hot skin
pull that hammer back, listen to it lock back
tears fought, swallowed hard, just to keep the fear back
finger twitch, like an itch, knew how to scratch it
let it drop, felt the hot round, just imagine
heat, like a flame in you brain, getting hotter
only regret was not writing to my daughter
in that dark room, all alone, that’s where I died
victim of a m-f suicide
fell into blackness, swallowed by the sadness,
dazed, in a crazed world, so I had to stop the madness
bright light came and went, I heard a voice speak my name
then my soul started getting hot, that’s when the demons came
snaggled tooth, long teeth, hands all grabbing at me
long claws, razor sharp, all them stabbing at me
started praying, asking god for forgiveness
a second chance, is what I need, if he gives it
I’ll change the way I live my life ooooo
I Never knew, hell was true, now I do
I’ll be better father, better son, a better friend
Please, don’t let this be the way it ends
then a bright light spread through the sky
a voice spoke and said “son, your not gonna die”
tears streaming, was I dreaming then I heard a yell
all clear, What happened next, I remember so well
two hands pulled me straight out of hell
And when I woke up, I was back in the motel,
A little shooken up, looking up, a bad headache
Staring into the eyes of a paramedic