I wrote this song sitting at union square in san francisco about a month ago around christmas time while on vacation.
White boy from inner city chicago who wants to be heard =)
Well I'm not a band, just a kid with a lot of free time, a pen and a pad and a sure mic. I do this not to gain any sort of recognition or to become famous or for money or whatever. I do it just because I find enjoyment from it.
Story behind the song
Just one of those times, where you just feel like nothing you do is right, and nothing you do will make things better and you are trying to figure out what the fuck went wrong.
Lyrics
sometimes i feel like im giving up
it just seems to be too much stuff
and i want to to just say enough already
my head feels like its gonna fall off
its so heavy,
but i know im ready
to face whatever comes my way
but this living day to day shit
feels like im locked up in chains
its crazy how this promising life became
one great big fucking ball of shame
why am I afraid?
why am I ashamed?
why dont I have the balls to seize the day?
and claim what ive always wanted
im haunted by a past that i think about and laugh
and i realize the past has passed
and the laughter's just a cover
while i hide and wonder
under the covers of protection
afraid of imperfection
and these choices ive selected
and this life that ive wrecked
and why am I perplexed
by things that are so hectic
will i finally erect my life
from this, destruction
will i face these lies and crush them..
or just run a muck,
not giving a fuck
relying on luck
to just
see me through, these many opportunities that i blew
but i try, through and through for you to see my point of view
but you wont.. you cant
cuz you havent had these choices that I had.
chorus:
giving up can feel right sometimes
but giving up aint right all the time X2
cuz i gave up, and i stood my ass right the fuck back up.. bitch
you tell me to relax
but you never asked
why im the way I am,
you just assume
while im sitting in this room
wishing you fucking knew
what i knew, but you'll never know
ill try and let ya know.. lets go
this side that i hide from those who look
no.. im not a crook.. nor a book worm
im just a kid who has tried to learn as much as i could
i can think of things, i should've done different
i got good parents, i have a solid structure
so why do I feel alone when surrounded by others.
my mother rasied me great, father did his best
i never felt any hate
but I cant seem to jump this fence
that surrounds my existence
wheres the motivation to eliminate complacence
i feel so impatient, but i cant seem to shake this
its fuckin pitiful to some, and great to others
and ill keep struggling on, whether living in the mud
or going to the top motherfucker..
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