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08. Oh My God, Amen
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A whole load of nonsense.
OH, HELLO. After writing songs since he was 5 years old and performing in bands since he was 9, Jared Woods (hatched and grown in Cape Town, South Africa), realised what was wrong. It was the simple essence of bands themselves: a collaborative collection of ideas which ultimately resulted in compromised visions and a cock-measuring competition of egos. It was with this epiphany that the protagonist figured out a new route to fully express his musical passion. Going solo. It was genius, as this approach ensured that the band would never have any reason to break-up, and that he and himself would hardly ever argue about direction. It’s the whole “if you want something done right...” cliche, all over again. So after lengthy conversations in his mind on the cold cobbled streets outside London pubs (where Jared had since relocated to chase the dream), Coming Down Happy was born. But despite the fact that the seed was planted as early as 2008, it took over 4 years for our hero to stop picking his nose and smelling his own farts, eventually finding the strength needed to grant this project its final lift-off, in 2012. The reasons for this delay were many, and not exclusively a result of laziness. No, instead this hindrance was owed above all else, to the approach in which Jared had chosen to release said songs, by creating something much more elaborate than your average musical project. Inspired by a recent lengthy heartbreak he had endured in 2009, the center of Coming Down Happy told the fictional tale of one rockstar named LegoTrip, who meets an evil girl that curses him with her poisonous vagina, causing him to fall deeply and irrationally in love with her. This story was not only communicated via the means of lyrics, but also with the aid of a comicesque-musical, each song supported by hundreds of cartoon images, carefully stitched together in video format, introducing a surreal world of characters and events. The whole concept was to be composed, sung, rapped, screamed, mixed, drawn, video-edited, and web-designed/developed by Jared Woods alone, and all of it available to the masses for free (with a planned comic book in the works, too). The project was so intricate, in fact, that the boy had convinced himself that when the original 4 part EP was released, he would surely be propelled into superstardom. No such luck, as almost the opposite took place. Due to the careless practice of mentioning real people and situations by name, blurring the line between reality and fiction, the outlet encouraged a vicious backlash to ensue, resulting in hate mail from anonymous listeners as well as his own parents, and even some seriously violent threats to his well-being. But this didn’t bother Jared as much as the lack of fame did, and he fell into a deep depression for months following. However, time has been good to the healing process, and the show must go on. And even in those dark days, Jared never once turned his back on the music, always letting the ideas stew, calculating his next move. A couple of even less successful singles later, and he was ready to continue the story he had started, following the turmoil of LegoTrip once again, observing the fight against misery in The Black EP sequel. This 4-track offering will be released song-by-song sporadically over 2013, in hopes that our cartoon friend may find some peace, and that Jared may find some fame. But regardless of outcomes, one thing's for certain: this abrasive, sample-heavy, multi-media, genre-crossing musical approach (standing currently as a hybrid of hip-hop flows, metal screams, horrorcore contexts, dark electropop ideals, scat scoobi-doo-bahs, dubstep drops, trip-hop sleeps, house-music satires, post-punk deliveries, raggamuffin irieness, and drum 'n' bass breaks - to name a few) featuring perverted adults themes (subjects including genitalia, mensturation, ejaculation, devirginizing, Satanism, blasphemy, suicide, abortions and murder) which are unnecessarily offensive without losing a sense of humour and cartoon cheerfulness... will always be completely unsignable, unmarketable or indescribable. But, hey, at least it will give you something to do with your afternoon.
Song Info
Charts
#20,965 today Peak #244
#1,850 in subgenre Peak #23
Author
Jared Woods
Uploaded
January 29, 2014
Track Files
MP3
MP3 2.6 MB 160 kbps 2:17
Story behind the song
After the intentionally filthy Dakota, I always knew I wanted the following song to stand as the polar opposite: light, happy, poppy. I approached this by studying J-Pop songs (like Po Pi Po and Nyanyanyanyanyanyanya by Miku Hatsune), but also wanted a heavily Bitpop/Chiptune/Synth-Pop vibe in the mix, by which I took influence from Ground Up/Knifeshow’s Gnarcade song, Anamanaguchi’s Meow song, David Bowie’s Low album, Crystal Castles’ debut album, and Yelle’s Safari Disco Club album. That said, I knew I simply had to conclude the tune with some proper face-raping black metal, which I mostly based on Cradle Of Filth’s Babalon A.D. track. As a result, if I had to truly pick this song apart, I'd say I took the relatively unknown Horse the Band’s sound, and broke it in two. For storyline purposes, I planned on including an a capella Doo-Wop breakdown in the middle, performed by yours truly. However, when looking for inspiration, I found that the song A Kiss from Your Lips by The Flamingos was in public domain, slapped that b*** in, and it worked just like that, no additions required. This kind of technique did remind me of countless songs from Kanye West’s Yeesuz album, and even though this was unintentional, I do listen to a f*** load of Kanye, so…? I also want to note that this is the only CDH piece so far with a one-track vocal take, for better or for worse. The story itself places focus back onto LegoTrip, but is also an imperative part of the overall tale, as the separate Lizzie/Demon Girl timelines finally come together right here. Scary! And you know how much I love a cliffhanger, ensuring the end of The Black EP sets up the final pieces of the adventure nicely. In the end, the surreal imagery and bouncy melodies really appealed to me, so much so that this is probably my favourite song on the journey so far, and is the only effort I wasn’t completely sick of by the time I finished. Rad, here’s to part 3.
Lyrics
Jeez, I can hardly believe I threw my body off a building Rather than throw a party with robot Lizzie, my best friend I guess I was under some stress, I guess when sex infests your life Your life becomes a mess until rescued by your best friend And now we’re in the biggest field of buttercups you’ve ever seen Kids are playing hopscotch with ice cream and candy floss machines Flowers smelt of cinnamon, their pollen turned to glitter when We got ‘em on our fingers and we licked ‘em up like vitamins Puppies with candy-coated apples Oh my God, amen Just a little booboo on my heart, little voodoo, now I’m peachy keen Maximum props to the Doo-Wop Triplets, kissing my thoughts and my penis clean Doo wop and doo wop And shoobie-doo and shoobie-doo Jeez, I can’t believe we found a bed here in this place We started jumping on it, got as far as outer space Honestly, the stars appeared to be peanut butter, got a bit of a taste It was a little bit bitter, I got wasted, threw up smiley faces And then I spilt a lot of red wine on a cop's uniform And of course he didn’t look happy, he looked at me like he’d seen me before He said “What’s wrong with you, are you on drugs? Don’t lie to me kid,” I replied I was, would he please give me a hug And he did Thought I lost my wallet, forgot it was in my pocket Nolan phoned me told me to come home, I told him, no, forget it I’d rather play this game of ping-pong with a unicorn in a school uniform No more fame, no more monsters, no more words, no more pains And then the sun smiled cos he knew everything all along Best friends don’t have sex so instead we rode a mastodon Besides she’s made of metal, I’m made of Lego, f*** ing would feel so wrong A kettle in the distance pissing in the wind was wearing a thong We wanted to see what he could see Oh my God And then over the hill I was in some kind of a hell There stood THE GIRL and she was nine stories tall And she was surrounded by armies of infants, and she said “I’m gonna kill you, f** And I’m‘na feed you to our baby cos I’m pregnant with your child I’m pregnant with your child I’m pregnant with your child I’m pregnant with your child”
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