14. Roundin' Up The Steers
A parody of Steely Dan's Reelin' In The Years
I've been creating all kinds of songs for over 30 years, but I never sell any of them. I try to give them away to charities that have musician spokespeople, but
Story behind the song
This is an absolutely true song. There is no exaggeration this time. I was visting my friend's ranch in Plummer, Idaho, & they did ask me to help with the branding. My job was to chase the calves into the chute with the cattle catcher, then the cows. After that, we were just moving the bulls down a chute, & into a truck, & the last one did manage to turn around in the door of the truck, & did run back down the chute. I hadn't gotten out, since it was the last bull, & there was no way to avoid getting hit by it, so I just decided to hit it first, & it turned it's horns just like the photo, & hit me with it's shoulder. I did fly up, & fall down behind it, without a scratch. It didn't get to stop & gore me or anything. And I did get back in the chute behind it again, to beat it's butt with half of my big stick, until it passed by my post again. This time, I did get out immediately afterwards, & it never came back. I was in shock, & the scene was in slow motion to me, but I knew that it was really coming fast. I was not brave, as brave is something that you choose, & if I had a choice, I would've been outside of the chute the first time.
Lyrics
You were visiting in Idaho,
Your friends, they had a ranch,
They asked if you would help them,
And you just jumped at the chance,
You chased the calves into the chute,
And then their mothers, too,
You did whatever it was,
That these fine folks asked you to do.
Are you roundin' up the steers?,
Having a good time?,
Did your friends break out in cheers,
When your cowboy hat went flyin'?!
( Repeat )
They had a big cow catcher,
It was halfway down the chute,
It held them there, 'til they could shave,
Some hair from their caboose,
The 'lectric brand, it seared their flesh,
And must have really hurt,
They let them go, so they could run,
And bray out in the dirt.
( Chorus ) (Repeat )
You were stuck before a charging bull,
You thought that you were dead,
So you raised your great big wooden pole,
And broke it on his head,
He hit you back, you flew straight up,
And then you fell straight down,
You were surprised to realize,
You were still both safe & sound.
( Chorus )
I was roundin' up the steers,
Havin' a good time,
And my friends broke out in cheers,
When my cowboy hat went flyin'!
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