I've worked with musicians and artists for decades and have observed a troubling problem that most musicians seem to suffer repeatedly in their relationships. Recently a musician friend confessed that his 5-year relationship with a woman he loved had ended over the holidays. Upon considering the reasons, he said that she did not like his lifestyle of being out playing music at night on the weekends (only a couple times a month no less). Did she know he was a musician when they met & became involved? Yes she did. This is the part I do not understand. If someone becomes involved with a musician (or any lifestyle really) knowing full well what that entails, how can they then end a relationship much later for something they knew what the partner did before becoming involved, or staying involved with a partner so long when one obviously didn't like the lifestyle known about from the start? Now I know many people--especially women, who have been socialized to believe these irrational things--believe that they can "change" a person, or that marriage will make their mate "settle down", or their "bachelor/ette ways" will change once in a relationship. However by now, most people know that no one can change another person, nor should they try to do so. Just turn the tables in your mind--how would YOU feel if some major part of your life was accepted in a relationship but then was used against you once the relationship had been established and long term? A silly example perhaps, but what if you have red hair, and a person gets involved with you & you both fall in love, move in together, maybe even get married, then your mate says "I want you to dye your hair black for me, forever, or I can't be with you as a redhead anymore"? How would that make you feel? Red hair is an essential part of who you are. Are you willing to become some one or thing else to be loved? I hope not. So how is it one can get involved with a musician (or artist or fill-in-the-blank), knowing their lifestyle and schedule, pursue the relationship long term, and then turn around & give an ultimatum--quit music, get a "real job", or else!--pressuring your loved one to give up an essential part of themselves? Why would you want to change an integral part of what drew you together, what you apparently liked to begin with, or at least did not have a problem with it overtly? To me, this is something that should be openly discussed in the beginning before a relationship becomes serious, expressing any concerns & questions about whatever elements of a potential mate's life that may concern one or that may become an issue. One need ask themselves, can I live with this person if they NEVER CHANGE anything about themselves or their lives. Can I accept everything about this person, the good the bad and the ugly, so to speak. Are there issues of one's own that will affect the relationship negatively or are causing one to ignore, deny & minimize the unacceptable aspects of a person, especially in the rosy glow of early love & lust? One need know themselves deeply, examine motives, beliefs, past relationship patterns, how much of the problem is YOU and unrealistic expectations, old values & beliefs from your upbringing, media & other influences, which beliefs are yours and which need to be examined for self-sabotaging, harmful effects in your relationships? To read the rest, since this blog is limited in length, follow this url: http://awolgina.blogspot.com/2012/01/relationships-musicians-otherwise.html

Nov. 10, 2011 by Gina Jordan AKA awolgina I used to import real industrial music 25 years ago, and find it frustrating when a band or group or anyone labels music industrial when it has NO industrial sounds in it. Real industrial music incorporates NOISE that is NON-musical-instrument based, if an instrument or computer makes the noise or sound, that is not industrial music in itself. However if it incorporates sounds & noise such as those below, it can be called industrial correctly. Examples of industrial sounds in music: * Machinery sounds * Factory noises * Banging a metal wrench on a machine * Smashing a piano to bits * Breaking glass or anything breakable * dry cleaner press noises * printing presses running * using instruments in unique ways An example of music being made from noise is best seen in these videos on youtube: * Dry cleaning press music http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FCLqfiSKGKE * Sound builders, read the description for more examples http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7con7qqh4qA&feature=related * Natural gas facility http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=53ZRXWwsHbg * Robotic motor noises http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epJVqkFsz1w Examples of actual industrial music include: * http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xm0L5JnAgI&feature=related * Kraftwerk http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jITrpmQIX-I * http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8f40gJ7xvs * http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NQITmKfquWs&feature=related * Using cymbals http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CTTPaz8O06k * http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vokZC_ewRYU&feature=related * http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8f40gJ7xvs&feature=related * http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xiLqrzdF3yE&feature=related * http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FdJBXOHawwQ&feature=related * http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rlOAf351vW0 * (WARNING: Video is DEAD people! Sound is industrial ambient) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZB5951GgF8&feature=related Examples of Mistakenly labeled industrial: * Electronic only http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IOJiilBSj8c&feature=watch_response * EXPLICIT! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S9Ik9FptGRU&feature=related Here's a description & history paragraph pasted from the wikipedia: "ndustrial music drew from a broad range of predecessors. Alexei Monroe argues that Kraftwerk were particularly significant in the development of industrial music, as the "first successful artists to incorporate representations of industrial sounds into nonacademic electronic music" [media] Industrial music was created originally by using mechanical and electric machinery, and later advanced synthesizers, samplers and electronic percussion as the technology developed. Monroe also argues for Suicide as an influential contemporary of the industrial musicians. [media] Groups cited as inspirational by the founders of industrial music include The Velvet Underground, Joy Division, and Martin Denny. [media] Genesis P-Orridge of Throbbing Gristle had a cassette library including recordings by the Master Musicians of Jajouka, Kraftwerk, Charles Manson, and William S. Burroughs. [media] P-Orridge also credited 1960s rock such as The Doors, Pearls Before Swine, The Fugs, Captain Beefheart, and Frank Zappa in a 1979 interview. [media] " Here's a link to a free sample download of early industrial music on the wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Throbbing_Gristle_-_What_A_Day.ogg Finally, for a more detailed & official resource to follow up on this topic further, here is the direct link to the wikiperdia Industrial Music page: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Industrial_music Enjoy exploring further :-) Gina Jordan AKA awolgina Copyright 11/10/2011.