i just turned 26, and this birthday means more to me than any other, because this year i can honestly say i'm lucky and blessed to be alive, and right now my family and friends could be mourning me instead of celebrating with me. we have it in our power to stop domestic violence and rape, but only if we aren't afraid to talk about it. with tina turner, rihanna, jaslene from america's next top model, and halle berry, we have public reminders that women in this country and this world are not safe. and often it's violence at the hands of the ones we love most. more victims need to speak out. and everyone, male and female, needs to listen. those who have experienced violence and who are in the public eye would do us all a great service by sharing their stories and trying to effect change. i am one of the lucky ones, the ones who got out and managed to survive. there are too many who don't. we have to teach our young men never to hit, beat or rape. and we have to teach our young women never to stay. as women we also can't resort to violence, despite attacks from all sides on our bodies and souls. most importantly, we must get help if we have a problem being violent or tolerating violence. amen.