[G] I never say the right thing when ita€™s [D] time
Nor I [C] nea€™er turn the mint words on a [G] dime
My spontaneous speeches are well [D] planned
And my [C] quick witted comebacks are all [G] canned
[G] She asked to my face just what I [D] thought
I re[C]sponded with a giggle and some [G] snot
I wiped off the dribble from my [D] lip
On to [C] wit and reason I lost my [G] grip
[G] I had my [C] chance to right this wrong
but you [G] know I wasna€™t strong
[G] I had my [D] chance to make her see
the value in a [G] tree
[G] I had my [C] chance to make things right
but [G] I didna€™t put up the fight
[G] I had my [D] chance yes I did
but [C] behind a smile I [G] hid
[G] She was curious about my [D] choice
paper or [C] plastic she said in that shill [G] voice
I showed her my reusable [D] bag
She said [C] oh that looks like a filthy [G] rag
[G] Why do you use it for groce[D]ries
Its [C] nasty and it smells like [G] cheese
I said oh sorry please forgive my [D] brie
but I [C] didna€™t say it came from the clean laun[G]dry
Chorus
Break
[G] I wona€™t touch your dirty cloth she [D] said
why [C] dona€™t you use paper bags in[G]stead
I just grinned and clenched down on my [D] teeth
all my [C] words were bubbling under[G]neath
[G] Under my breath I said its for the [D] trees
But she [C] looked up and said gross these are [G] peas
I wondered what I should say to this [D] lass
but I [C] couldna€™t pull the words out of my [G] ass
Chorus