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Advertisement: The Naughty Wench
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A Renaissance parody of contemporary strip club ads.
irish folk songs scottish
Marc Gunn is an Irish and Scottish folk singer with a strange affinity for Celtic ballads, drinking songs and cats, and he is the lead singer for the Brobdingna
Marc Gunn is an Irish and Scottish folk singer with a strange affinity for Celtic ballads, drinking songs and cats, and he is the lead singer for the Brobdingnagian Bards.
Song Info
Genre
World • Traditional Celtic
Charts
Peak #28
Peak in subgenre #6
Author
words Marc Gunn, Karen Brady, music Brob. Bards
Rights
Marc Gunn
Uploaded
October 11, 2007
Track Files
MP3
MP3 2.1 MB • 192 kbps • 2:17
Lyrics
The Naughty Wench by Marc Gunn and Karen Brady ANNOUNCER: Come to The Naughty Wench, an upscale Knight Club, catering to the discriminating Lords and noblemen by offering some of life's most opulent luxuries that today's successful Renaissance man requires. Located only four minutes from the village square, we feature saucy wench entertainment, while offering a complete pub with the finest selections of ale, mead, beer, and wine. WENCH 1: Eh! SIHR! Are ye gonna drink or ye wanna go upstairs for a shag? KNIGHT 1: Huh? Right. Uh. I'll have your finest ale! WENCH 1: Finest? We got one ale and that's what you'll drink! KNIGHT 1: Fine then. Ale, please. WENCH 1: [under breath] Please. Bloody noblemen! For sports fans, there's one ring for cock fighting and one for the best pay-per-view sword fights. [insert sword fighting and cock barking] ANNOUNCER: Beautiful women and the finest grain alcohols. Plus, there's a gourmet kitchen with food from the finest Parisian chef who was taken on the way back from the last Crusade. He will satisfy your every hunger indulgence. CHEF: ALLO! You stupid woman! Bring ze Ratatouille to table 2. [sound of spitting] Tell 'em iss the special sauce! WENCH 1: [laughs] You got it mon-sewer. CHEF: MONSIEUR! You idiot! ANNOUNCER: Enjoy two-for-one pole dances on Tuesday nights. KNIGHT: It's called a LAHNCE! Hullo?! ANNOUNCER: And there's no cover Mondays through Thursdays. The Town Crier hails it as a bawdy and saucy treat for the discriminating Nobleman. WENCH: Alright! Who's up for some bodice diving! [sound of clanking armour as knights get up and race over to be the first] [wench laughs] ANNOUNCER: Friday nights are extra special with Wet Chemise contests featuring the loveliest maidens you may want to have for your Primum Noctum rights. [whistles and catcaws admidst the sound of spraying water] KNIGHT: Right! You got it missey! Wooooo! ANNOUNCER: Come to The Naughty Wench and turn your noble dreams into a reality!
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