Music is full of tradition. Whether its an inspiring tune or a commitment to write music from the heart, the band members of Los Angeles based metal band Mach
Song Info
Genre
Author
MOA
Uploaded
November 12, 2025
Track Files
MP3
MP3 5.8 MB • 186 kbps • 4:22
Lyrics
Alright! So I'm walkin' down Sunset, right? Tryna get a damn hot dog. And this... thing... comes up to me... I don't know what I'm lookin' at! Let me tell ya somethin'...
[Verse 1]
Cruisin' down to Melrose, lookin' for a fight
See a dude with a beard in a dress, ain't a pretty sight
He's got a V-neck down to his navel, chest hair in the breeze
Talkin' 'bout his "journey," oh for fuck's sake, please!
Ordered a soy latte with a side of righteous rage
Called the barista "problematic" for checkin' out his gauge
Got his pronouns on a name tag, a paragraph long
If I get one single letter wrong, I'm suddenly HITLER HONG KONG!
[Chorus]
HOLLYWOOD TRANSFORMERS! More than meets the eye!
HOLLYWOOD TRANSFORMERS! Don't know if I should laugh or cry!
HOLLYWOOD TRANSFORMERS! Swappin' out the chassis!
Autobots, Decepticons, and L.A.'s f-in' classy!
ROBOTS IN DISGUISE!
[Verse 2]
Went to Erewhon for a bottle of water, cost me 20 bucks
Stood behind some blue-haired chick who used to be a schmuck
Now she's got a voice deeper than my old man's Lincoln Ford
Yellin' 'bout her "safe space" while the cashier looks bored
She's got a brand new set of tits, paid for by the state
But she's mad 'cause the patriarchy made her show up late
Used to be named Kevin, now she's "Starlight Moonbeam Child"
The shit they do in California's just gettin' too fuckin' wild!
[Chorus]
HOLLYWOOD TRANSFORMERS! More than meets the eye!
HOLLYWOOD TRANSFORMERS! Don't know if I should laugh or cry!
HOLLYWOOD TRANSFORMERS! Boltin' on the plastic!
Your gender's like your politics: completely f-in' spastic!
ROBOTS IN DISGUISE!
[Bridge]
"What happened to this place? Huh? Back in the day, a dude was a dude, a broad was a broad. You knew what you were gettin'. Now? Now I need a goddamn instruction manual just to say hello! 'Excuse me, Zir, can you pass the non-binary, gluten-free, ethically-sourced ketchup?' WHAT?! You're a dude... who thinks he's a chick... who likes other chicks... who think they're dudes! MY HEAD HURTS! Just pick a team! You can't be an Autobot AND a Decepticon! It's not how it works! GET A JOB!"
[guitar solo]
[Verse 3]
There's a rally in Echo Park, they're screamin' at the sky
For the rights of two-spirit pangolins, I don't even know why!
He-she-they-them army, with their signs and vocal fry
Wanna cancel everything that ever caught my eye!
From my Black Sabbath T-shirt to the way I chew my food
Everything's a micro-aggression from some cis-het dude!
They're choppin' off their wieners, addin' parts like Mr. Potato Head
Sometimes I swear to God this whole damn city's brain-dead!
[Outro Chorus]
HOLLYWOOD TRANSFORMERS! More than meets the eye!
HOLLYWOOD TRANSFORMERS! Go ahead and f-in' cry!
HOLLYWOOD TRANSFORMERS! It's a goddamn freak show parade!
They're all just confused motherfuckers tryin' to get laid!
ROBOTS IN... SURGICAL... DISGUISE!
