THE HEATON PARK WORKINGMEN’S CLUB
I’d finished my tea
It was crap on TV
So I thought I’d go down to the pub
Where I met Yvonne
Who was rabbitting on
‘Bout the Heaton Park Workingmen’s Club
Where unless you’re a bloke
Then you don’t get to vote
I could tell she was up to no good
And it was annoying
She talked of destroying
The Heaton Park Workingmen’s Club
Yvonne & her friends
Shouted “Death to all men!”
And I said “Any chance of a shag?”
But she got up to go
It was then that I noticed
The dynamite in her handbag
I rang 999
They said “Please hold the line”
For an hour & then I gave up
So I went to bed
With her words in my head
‘Bout the Heaton Park Workingmen’s Club
It was just after two
When Yvonne & her crew
Cut a hole in the razor wire fence
Then up rolled the SWAT team
“Surrender!”, the cops screamed
The atmosphere was getting tense
Then Yvonne let loose
With some verbal abuse
On the rights of all womanhood
We’re making a stand
Til you meet our demands
At the Heaton Park Workingmen’s Club
Some call her a hero
Some call her a saint
And some call her a militant bitch
The general conclusion
Was in the confusion
By accident she pulled the switch
A big blinding flash
Then a bang and a crash
Could be heard the entire neighbourhood
So that was the end
Of Yvonne and her friends
And the Heaton Park Workingmen’s Club
