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Story behind the song
I wrote this when I was 18 and had recently moved to New Jersey to live on my own. I was living in a tiny loft above my boyfriend's sister's house and wrote this song very quietly. And yes, I worked for 4 dollars an hour, 6 days a week, while possibly alcoholic and with infected sinuses.
Lyrics
it's getting hard/it's getting hard/to keep from dying/
so get over here/get over here/and give me a kiss/
4 dollars an hour/6 days/a sinus infection/possible alcoholism:
according to you.
he thinks/he's a love machine/
he thinks/he gives me everything/
but i've been thinking:
i don't know how to love anymore
just give me a beer/just give me a beer/
and maybe i'll think about quitting
i know you hate me/ i know hate me/
but i don't care/ cause
today i'm a drunk/ today i'm a girl/
today i'm my own cobain/
so just give me the beer
chorus
i like a boy/i like a boy/
and he isn't even mine
and is this confusion/an illusion/
or is it just in my heart
so i go on and off for him/
but he's always turning me on
sweet rejection (i don't know what you want/ i don't know if you already have it)
we can't help it/ we can't help it/ if we only feel good when we're high/
i'm getting tired/ tired/ of being the ugly girl/
so won't you just let me crash/ into this grave i've dug myself:
hallejuah.
chorus
