Well my Wife has gone and left me, and my dog has gone and died
My Son looks just like my Brother, kinda think my brother lied.
Cousin Joe married my Sister, cos he liked her apple pies
They sure got a pretty Daughter, even though she’s got three eyes
We’re just one big family
With a real short family tree
We all kinda look the same
Fourteen toes and half a brain
We love to keep the family name
Daddy said I need a girlfriend, cousin Jean would be my date
She’s been with seven of my Brothers, but they all said she was great
When Daddy ran off with my Aunty, I must admit we had some fears
But their son is kinda handsome, even though he shaves his ears
We’re just one big family
With a real short family tree
We all kinda look the same
Fourteen toes and half a brain
We love to keep the family name
We all kinda look the same
Fourteen toes and half a brain
We love to keep the family name
