Wolves Get Paid Written by: Jim J. Barakat Sore throat in the morning, I’ve had better days; days when I wasn’t insane, days when I was okay. Ugly endings have twisted me up in this little trap; it’s not one that you’ve set, it’s not anything I appreciate. But I’ve done this to myself. There isn’t anyone to blame, although I loved playing that game and now I am finished with it. I will fuck myself over just to get fucked again; while she’s still with him and he’s not me. I’ll walk into the light; I’ll walk out of this place. You won’t see a trace if you’d just give me some pointers. Like downing a bottle of pills and getting a one way ticket to Christ; transferring to Hinsdale for the night. Would you be surprised? Or just tear out my lungs and feed them to the wolves; I’d still be better off than you and far less depressed. Don’t let me hold you back. Don’t let me chirp this tune. You have the rest of your life ahead, that one you’re dying to end. Take what’s at stake and stick it through my heart. Bleed all this out; just make it go away. I’m sick of this face like I am sick of these days. They’d be better spent alone without myself. This is fucking up my life and you’re just fucking with my head. Make up your fucking mind or just hang me out to dry. My plate is full of food and my life is filled with shit; and those wolves are getting hungry. I’ll just have them take care of it. As I sit here now I am thinking out loud. I don’t even recognize my own voice so I am sure this is all a dream. Because there’s a wolf at my leg and there are teeth in my skull. Yet there’s no sign of you which means I am still better off. ©2008
