Upbeat song about joint replacements, heart bypass, cataracts, etc.
RACHEL STONE - Songwriter and cabaret singer of original topical and satirical songs. Writes witty, insightful lyrics and musically interesting original tunes i
Lyrics
Artificial Parts
Words & Music by Rachel Stone, 9/10/2006 • © 2006, Rachel Stone
I'm singing hip, hip, hip, hip hooray.
I got a brand new hip just the other day.
My surgeon says it's quite dynamic:
Titanium and ceramic.
Who knows where my real hip ends or starts,
When it's got Artificial Parts.
I'm singing oh, oh, oh, golly gee.
My leg’s implanted with a brand new knee.
Now each time my leg is bent,
I wonder where my knee bone went.
Bends my mind, having joints depart,
And replaced with Artificial Parts.
When I was young I was naive indeed
I thought fake boobs were all the parts I'd need
But I require more parts as I'm older
Next month I get an artificial shoulder!
(shimmy shimmy shake!)
I'm singing ay, ay, ain't it a gas?
My heart went through a quadruple bypass.
Now my love has lost its flow
Cardiac arteries: where'd you go?
Who knows what remains real in my heart
When it's got Artificial Parts!
I'm singing me, me, me, me-oh-my!
I've got a new acrylic lens in my eye.
When they cut out my cataract,
They put this plastic gizmo back.
Now my vision's seeing off the charts
With my eye's Artificial Parts!
Though traveling has always had its charms
At airports now I set off the alarms
I can't get through the metal detector,
Security's convinced I'm a defector
(or terrorist!)
I'm singing hey, hey, hey, ain't it neat!
I finally got relief for my feet!
No surgeons, no robotics.
I'm walking on shoe orthotics!
Coming, going, I just cannot start
Without artificial,
All these artificial,
Without Artificial Parts!
