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My wife's karate class
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I write all kinds of music from gospel to country, comedy to childrens songs as well as instrumentals. I play guitar (acoustic and lead) and sing with a count
I was born in the mid 1950's, and began playing guitar when I was 14 years old. I have played with many of the early (70's & 80's)country singers. I wrote my first song when I was 15 and now have over 120, from gospel to country. I love the challenge of writing a song that people can relate to, yet to say it in a brand new way. I play with a local group called Common Bond and jam whenever I can find some others pickers.
Song Info
Genre
Podcasts • Comedy
Charts
#3,276 today Peak #44
#860 in subgenre Peak #9
Author
Doug York
Rights
2006
Uploaded
July 17, 2006
Track Files
MP3
MP3 4.0 MB • 128 kbps • 4:24
Lyrics
My wife’s karate class My wife who’s only four foot five, announced to me late one night, That she’d signed up for a class on self-defense. I laughed and said now that’s so silly, such an awful waste of money, But nothin’ you do’s ever made a lick of sense. Six months later I’d forgot ‘bout all those lessons she had bought, I staggered home from a night out on the town. She was at the door when I walked in, said I’m tired of you being late again, I’ve had enough of your tom-cattin around. Chorus It’s time I showed you a thing or two, don’t ‘preciate the likes of you, I don’t like the way you’ve kept the upper hand. Gonna show you what I’ve learned in class, I’m fixin’ now to whip your… So you might as well just take it like a man. She bowed at me like those Chinese do, like in Karate or Jujitsu. Then she went into this funny little stance. I thought to myself she’s gone mad, don’t care ‘bout how many belts she has, I’ll rip her apart, she ain’t got a chance. Well I’ll admit to my surprise, I guess I musta blinked my eyes, Somehow she’d slipped between me and the door. Then quick as a wink she grabbed my wrist, and gave it just a little twist, And just like that I was sprawled out on the floor. Somehow my wife caught me off guard; I said alright you’ve gone too far, As I tried to get up, sumpin’ hit me in the jaw. When I woke up, four teeth were gone, how can sumpin’ that little, be that strong? Now this ole boy’s eating supper thru a straw. So if your wife ever says, she’s enrolled herself in a karate class, Don’t let her do it, unless you’re gonna take em too. I promise you she has a plan, someday get even with her man, Don’t be surprised when she says these words to you. Spoken: “Man I’m hurtin’ I can hardly move. I had to have stitches, I even messed in my britches, How am I ever gonna face my buddies again. I’m scared to death of her. I’m so embarrassed……” Doug York (c)2006
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