Free download
People say we rock hardcore.
...people don't say we rock hardcore.
We are Voltaire Adams and reelmojo. Voltaire Adams is 20 years old. He does singing, voice acting, and writing. reelmojo is 24 years old. He does singing, voice acting, writing, guitar playing, and technical stuff (which rarely gets more advanced than "typing").
Song Info
Genre
Charts
Peak #32
Peak in subgenre #6
Author
reelmojo and Voltaire Adams
Rights
2006
Uploaded
July 13, 2006
Track Files
MP3
MP3 9.2 MB • 128 kbps • 10:00
Story behind the song
One last time, might as well do commentary.
50th Anniversary? That doesn't seem physically possible! I've had that "Prince of All Cosmos Training Academy" part written for probably about a month now. It makes you think you're getting a list and then nope, no list. It's the perfect swerve. We had to make some jokes about how it's actually July too. The "Buy Gatorade" thing is what we wish real commercials were like. Seriously, just tell us what your product is and then get the hell off of out TVs... or radios... or internets in this case. Tom from MySpace needed to be mocked, which was a perfect way to fit in Victoria's mod, "emo." The emo voice I'm doing is the same as "emo reelmojo" from our PRC The Movie entry. Chanting LAOS's name is a callback to something you haven't even heard yet, since it was in an out take. We're posting out takes from our first 10 FunnyHaHas soon though, so no worries. I love the jokes about The KUPO and The Rally-Ho, even though only hardcore FF fans will get them. And "smooth jimmy between my buttcheeks" should probably never be said by anyone. Then we have more Star Ocean music... I'm pretty much a Motoi Sakuraba fanboy. We don't actually think Darth GourryGN is a bitch, that's just a throwback to The KWEH Part 3. 1969... I'd like to point out that Brian Adams was the first concert I ever went to. I was roughly 9 years old. *ahem* I'd also like to point out that Voltaire didn't know what "shill" meant. He probably won't want me to say that in here, but I figure this way I'll know whether or not he read this commentary. 1982 was the year I was born, which is why I call in then... of course. It all makes perfect sense if you just pretend that we say other things. 1994, when the Church of LAOS was established... God I love that LAOS worship line. The Pepsi Blue jokes are actually referencing The KWEH Part 1 as well as our real life love of Pepsi Blue. Seriously, Voltaire has some in his fridge right now. The we take some calls. Victoria! Sure she worked with Voltaire on his solo submission, but this is the first time I worked with her too. Her evil laugh cracks me up everytime. Oh and if you haven't figured it out yet, she's Muffin Mix Girl... so MMG is Voltaire's sister. That means anyone who accused us of being her, or accused me of being Voltaire and her (which was hilariously retarded) was very wrong. If you weren't one of those people, please take a moment to laugh at those who were. It's okay, this text will still be here when you're done. There, doesn't that feel better? Now onto a girl playing djpretzel. Stacey continues to read her lines completely differently than I imagined them while making them funnier than they were probably written. In case you're wondering, Stacey is no one's sister... I mean... she has siblings but... you know what I mean. I especially love "You will worship no god before me!" We then have more of Summertime than ever before, but I still cut out the guitar solo so if you haven't downloaded the song, what the hell is wrong with you? Then, in the ending we reference both "The Legend of the Flying Embarassment" and LAOS's "The Longest Comedic Pause in History" at the same time. But oh! Rupert gets cut off by the 10 minute submission deadline that was clearly made only for us before he gets to ask Darla his question! That's right, for once we stayed under 10 minutes. It's almost exactly 10 minutes to the millisecond actually. One last thing, when we say this is the last KWEH for Funny HaHa, we mean it. Seriously, all of that editing is a lot of work... so the next time you hear the KWEH it'll be on our very own podcast! That is if we get off of our asses and actually do it. Which we will. Because we want fans. And money. And LAOS.
...mostly LAOS.
*chants LAOS's name from midnoon to midnight*
Lyrics
*standard Summertime intro*
Radio Guy: Alright, that was Summertime by Hale-Bopp, still on top of our playlists after being released 50 years ago. That's right KWEH fans, here at the KWEH we are celebrating our 50th year of being on the airwaves. And to commemorate that, all this week we will be taking a look back on some classic moments over the past 49 years. So lets take a short break and we'll be right back with more of the things you like.
*133.7 Kweh Jingle*
Commercial #1: Hero of All Cosmos Training Academy
Prince - The cosmos needed a hero.
King - *kings voice effect from the game*
Prince - Hey for you dad, anything!
Prince - But obviously, I needed help before I could save anyone. So that's why I went to the Prince of All Cosmos Training Academy.
Jeff - When I first met the Prince he was young, weak, and stupid... and come on, he didn't even have a Katamari! But here at the Prince of All Cosmos Training Academy he learned everything he needed to be a true hero, and you can too! So come on down and get your degree in...
Rolling things into a ball
...or get your degree.
Prince - With the things I learned at the Prince of All Cosmos Training Academy, I now have the power to do... whatever it is I do.
Crappy Announcer - The Prince of All Cosmos Training Academy... opening this J... um... guys? It it's already July. This doesn't make any fucking sense.
Boss: Listen, just read what we wrote, alright?
Crappy Announcer: ...opening this July.
*KWEH Jingle*
Commercial #2: Gatorade
Buy Gatorade Guy 2: BUY GATORADE! DO IT! IT'S GOT ELECTROLITES AND SHIT, SO JUST FUCKING BUY IT!
*cute little jingle*
Buy Gatorade Guy 3: Gatorade... it's got electrolites and shit.
*end commercial*
*KWEH Jingle*
Commercial #3: MySpace
*Intermission*
Tom: Having trouble finding someone?
Lame guy 1: I couldn't find anyone.
Tom: Do the people in your area just not seem to have the same interests as you.
LG1: The people in my area just don't seem to have the same interests as me.
Tom: I'm Tom from MySpace.com here to tell you about a great way to meet new exciting people.
LG1: He's Tom from MySpace.com here to tell you about a great way to meet new exciting people.
Tom: By becoming a user of MySpace.com you are practically guaranteed to meet great new people, no matter who you are!
LG1: Even me?
Tom: No not you. Just listen to all of these testimonials from amazing people that you could be meeting right now if you too were a member of MySpace.com.
(LG1: I'm gonna leave)
Gu1: Yeah, I was on MySpace for not even a minute and I already had a friend on my list! I was a bit sceptical to talk to him at first, especially when he started asking for nude pics. But I swear, sending those nude pics was the best thing I've ever done! Now, I wasn't exactly looking for a guy on guy relationship, but hey, don't knock it till you've knocked it with a guy! Thanks Tom!
Girl: I didn't have too many friends on my list at first, but once I posted that picture of me with a little bit of cleavage, I had more friends than Panic! at the Disco! That's not even really possible!
Tom: That's right, here at MySpace.com you can meet people of every type imaginable! Emo people, straight people, gay people, emo people... even bi-polar people!
(LG1: Are you taking about me!?)
Crappy Announcer: Myspace.com... it's already open... nothing about July this time... fuck off, I quit.
Boss 2: But Lukey!
Crappy Announcer: (in the background) No, no fuck this shit...
*KWEH jingle*
Radio Guy: Alright we're back! It's been 50 glorious years of the KWEH and we're having a huge celebrations! Let's take a look back at some of the fantastic moments we've had over this last half a millenium!
*flashback*
1956
Old announcer: The year is 1956 and the Cold War rages on... between new wave radio statio the KWEH and longtime favorite the KUPO! In their l
