We’ve had a lot of you Van Stoniacs askin’: Where this band came from and Who are they? So hopefully this will shut your yap. Van Stone is Palmdales number 3 rock band, right behind number 1 Skirge and number 2 Wind Jammer Duh. Randy and Lonnie Van Stone are fraternal twin brothers that live at home with their mom. They met Glenn Wolfe in high school, he taught them how to get high by sniffing Soft Scrub and other bathroom cleaning products. A few years back while getting’ drunk, they were hangin' down at the train tracks and throwing rocks at a light pole. That's when they hooked up with Alexis Patinkov, aka Mr. Bonze, the drummer. He’s originally from the former Yugoslavia and speaks little English, but man can he drum. That night, they decided to form a mercenary group like the "A-team" and fight bad dudes, help over throw South American governments, and bang Hot Chix! After, being denied several times for gun licenses and unable to find a large black dude with a mowhawk that could weld. They decided to go to plan B, FORM A BAND, this way they can at least bang Hot Chix and maybe, if they tour through South America over throw a government! They found a guitar dude named BC Rich, maybe you’ve heard of him, that’s right the legendary BC Rich, turns out he lives right here in Palmdale. They wrote songs based on Freedom and the American way, sex drugs, and rock-n-roll, and created a sound that could be used to score the apocalypse. Everything was cool, untill tragedy struck. BC lost his hand in meat grinding accident. NOTE TO KIDS: don’t try to make homemade gourmet sausages while high on prescription narcotics. So now they got a new guitar player, he’s really from Lancaster, but they jumped him in. His name’s Cliff Stienberger. A lot people mistake him for a skinhead but he’s just a bald guy that shaves it tight, like Bruce Willis. When are comb-overs going to be punk again? Anyway, if you know any large black dudes with a mowhawk that can weld . Send him Van Stone’s way. Because one of these days, when you’re in trouble, and you’ve got no one else to turn to. You may need to call on: Van Stone. LIVE STONED!