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You Don't Stand a Chance with that Red Head
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Inspired by the bar room oneupsmanship of Larsen and &.
urban sex legends eminem
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Pre-modern, post-fabricated rock icons bent on the desruction of convention.
Early in the year 1994 a young D.A.R.E. officer named Thomas Larson decided to use the new "grungey" music to help keep kids away from drugs and crime. He was able to persuade petty Faberge egg thief Franklin Fukkface, and Leonard "Noballs" Lackingtesticles, a down and out male prostiture to join his band. With the backup instrumentation provided by Fukkface on Bass and "Noballs" on drums. The Urban Sex Legends had a minor hit with "Endless Nowhere" a "lame" white boy funk number written by Larson and Lackingtesticles. The untimely demise of second lead singer Josh Queefer due to an O.D. on horse tranquilizers and elephant speed robbed the band of a frontman, and the world of one of it's most passionless performers. Queefer's death hit Larson very hard. He checked himself into a "home." At this point USL was thought to have been disbanded. But &, the enigmatic spiritual and musical leader of the Rotating Weasel Fish had long been a fan of the group and decided to take control. Now, in a brand new incarnation, with & at the helm, and Larson (now referring to himself as Akbar Queen Supreme of the Spamiverse)channelling his maniacal guitar urges from the confines of a padded cell. In a feat common to women but rare for musical acts, The Urban Sex Legends managed a second coming. After inking a deal with fledgling label Greeoark Records, the band plunged deep into the studio and began thrusting at new ideas. With & now handling keyboard, vocal and production duties, productivity buldged. The creative spurt yielded two new tracks which, along with material culled from the band’s extensive back catalog, became The University of Perversity. After the erection of an elaborate stage show, a tour commenced, much to the arousal of regional audiences. After months of drinking, drugging and dyspepsia, however, the band went limp. Fukkface and Lackingtesticles found themselves suddenly ejaculated by an incensed Larsen, who sighted “severe chafing” as the cause of rupture. So began a long, hard hiatus. While Akbar Queen Supreme of the Spamiverse used the time for self stimulation, the mystical & traveled to the Himalayan Mountains in search of Baron Mordo, whom he had recently faced in the hip hop battle “Bitch, Why You Disrespecting the Eye of Agomotto?” When Larsen and & reconvened auditions began for a new rhythm section. Each prospective member was treated to lunch, and after much tea bagging and salad tossing, drummer Woodrow Wilson and bassist Oral Roberts proved to be delightful bedfellows. The new lineup slipped quietly into a Beaverton, Oregon studio and began foreplay toward a new album entitled Fuck That Noise.
Song Info
Genre
Rock Rock n Roll
Charts
#2,523 in subgenre Peak #30
Charts
Peak #433
Author
&
Rights
2004
Uploaded
March 09, 2005
Track Files
MP3
MP3 1.8 MB 128 kbps 0:00
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