My friends call me up and they are worried
But they can't understand, on no!
Though my toaster's still under warranty
It doesn't toast from head to toe
CHORUS
Toaster too short, bread too tall
Toaster too short, bread too tall
Why I bother getting out of bed at all
When my toaster's too short and my bread's too tall.
There needs to be a standard bread size
To avoid this calamity
The government needs to legislate
This threat to national security
CHORUS
I can overlook the big things in life
But the little things have so many details
If they could only be fixed right now
Every day wouldn't be a living hell.
CHORUS
