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Song Info
Genre
Author
Vagenda
Rights
1995 Vagenda. All rights reserved
Uploaded
February 15, 2016
Track Files
MP3
MP3 6.6 MB • 160 kbps • 5:45
Story behind the song
*WARNING*
If you would rather enjoy this piece of art and have it come to mean something truly unique to you, do not read the backstory. Just as the band “Aerosmith” once criticized the music video industry of robbing fans from having their own visions of imagery associated to a song and supplanting it with some “official” footage, so too can knowing a songs backstory potentially come to rob it of having some special place and meaning for you.
Or both can exist. It’s all really subjective. Proceed with understanding.
Thank you,
V
The Official Backstory
One of the earliest memories I have of my real feather was before I was 1 year old, being in the basement where I knew I wasn't supposed to be, hearing him come home, and climbing the stairs trying to not get caught down there, and he opens the door to the basement just as I am at the top of the stairs, see's me there, and immediately kicks me, sending me flying back down the stairs. I looked up at him confused and hurt, and see him laughing. I started to laugh with him. I wasn't even a year old yet, I didn't know how to react.
He would go on to be ritually abusive to my mother. He left when I was 3, and made it clear he wanted nothing to do with me. For the rest of his life, he proved he meant it.
My mother moved on eventually to another man that was every bit as abusive. He was a fat angry drunk with an alpha male complex. He seen the world in a very narrow way, and he was the star in it. If you didn't agree, you were seen as an enemy and attacked. He had this same attitude in business and at home, and never knew how to identify this problem, let alone correct it. He drives people away from him. Those that stay by his side stand to gain financially by doing so, otherwise, there is nobody - friend or family. So much wasted potential it is hard to look at, then he gives you every reason to hate him, so why even strain to look at it.
This song is primarily about all the dishonorable deeds, violence, attempts to control, and so on that I witnessed over the course of years "under his roof".
Lyrics
Domestic Violence
© 1995 Vagenda. All rights reserved
(March 23, 1995)
(Composed at age 18)
(Recorded on November 04, 2015)
I would try to hold you
I would try just to scold you
I would try to start a fight
I would try tonight
I know my limitations
Is this your extended invitation
I know that you've been to hell and back
But you have not seen nothing yet
I would die to caress you
I would die to possess you
You're a bitch, FUCK-OFF!
You're a slut and we ought to know 'cause
And I know that it's true, how I feel about you
Is just another way
Just another way to say I love you
Love you
Just another way
Just another way to say I love you
Looking back, scar me
Would you still mar me
Feed the dogs antifreeze
Kill the vicious memories
I know where you've been
I know where you've been
I know where you've been
I know where you've been
with him!
with him!
with him!
with him!
again
again
again
again
I would try to hold you
I would try just to scold you
I would try to start a fight
I would try tonight
And I know that it's true, how I feel about you
Is just another way
Just another way to say I love you
Sunshine
Sunshine, open your arms to me
Sunshine,
Sunshine, hold me in your warmth
hell, it's so cold.
*solo*
I know my limitations
Is this your extended invitation
I know that you've been to hell and back
But you have not seen nothing yet
Nothing yet
Nothing yet
Nothing yet
Nothing yet
