I went for a little walk
Just a quick trip around the block
To take in some cool autumn air
She pulled up next to me
And asked "Which way to the Piggly Wiggly?"
She was so pretty, I just stood there and stared
I asked "How about a date?"
She said "That sounds great,
Friday at nine, I'll even make up my face."
We had some wine, we had a dance
I thought "Here's my chance."
So I took her home to my place.
Where she said she really likes my weiner
She thinks it's fun when he stands up straight
She spent all night playing with my weiner
And I can't wait for our second date
I like to take my weiner out
When I'm running errands, out and about
I'm just so proud, I want the world to see
Children scream and women cry
Old folks say "My oh my"
Sometimes a fella will even wink at me
One day in a park downtown
A female officer chased me down
And said "Sir, you have to keep the weiner restrained.
I won't give you a ticket this time
Because your weiner looks so fine."
She gave me a paper with her number and her name
Well all the girls really like my weiner
They think it's fun when he stands up straight
They just can't get enough of my weiner
My weiner gets me lots of dates
Sometimes when I'm all alone
I draw the curtains, turn off the phone
And I spend the evening just messing with my weiner