Parody of "Cowboy" by Kid Rock
kid rock
cowboy
grocery store
bag boy
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Story behind the song
Some people are very proud of their jobs...even if it's only as a bag boy at the local grocery store.
Lyrics
Oh well, this tag it has my name…and it’s pinned to my chest
While I’m only twenty-six, I know that I’m best
Yes this job pays the bills, that’s not it…
High school, I dropped out…I’ve found my purpose!
I’m at the Food Mart, it is just down the block
Where I am like a jock with my apron smock
Put your stuff in a bag, sayin’ “Hi, Mrs. Jones”
Then thank her, wish her a safe drive home
I wake up with the sun, wrangle the carts
Find register six, then work I will start
Help some wily grandma to find the soap
There’s no doubt, man this store is like my home
The new guys get nervous, I’ll teach them my secrets
“When people shop, they must know you mean business”
No joke, no I won’t disappoint
‘Cause I’m the very best, sucker...no one can beat me, I’m a…
Bag boy, baby
With the price tags strapped, and my big smile shinin’
Bag boy, baby
Keep things moving when there’s long lines
(The people love me!) Bag boy, baby
Coupons, all right! Saved ten cents today!
Bag boy, baby
I won’t crush your eggs, they will be okay
I bet your mind, I will be blowing when you walk right in
You’ll say (impressed whistle) “Man, what should I get?”
Fresh shrimp, jack cheese, bananas and limes
Get what you want…I’ll serve you, no time
Cashier is Steve, my name is Mike
We’re the best team by far, come right through our line
You got stuff one mile high? And we’ll still make it quick, boy
“And you have a real-nice-day” That’s how I roll, I’m the
Bag boy, baby
With a plastic bag, or the paper kind – I’m
Bag boy, baby
Carts, I’ll fill ‘em in record time
(Known ‘round the world as) bag boy, baby
No long lines ‘cause of my quick pace
Bag boy, baby
Frito’s aren’t in six, they’re in aisle eight!
Yeah...you’ve got seven loaves of bread
Bag them all up sep’rate so they wouldn’t get wrecked
New guy Jimmy starts to sweat when he sees glass
I said, “Wrap them tight in a paper bag!”
No kidding, I’m doing ev’ry job in this store
Keep shelves stocked, trash gets tossed, even waxing the floors
Customers acting careless- messed things up, ain’t right!
I’ll restock things again, I’ll stay here all night! UGH!
There’s lettuce, mixed with all the cold cuts
But it keeps me busy, no I do not hate this
It’s my pleasure, bag boy player
I would never leave, but boss says I have’ta
Ladies always hit on me...mothers ask “Boy, why aren’t you married?”
I say calmly, “I might do that sometime later...
but right now I am working, it don’t get much better!”
Worshiped, a savior...statues were built
A tattoo on my bicep that says “Paper or Plastic?”
I’m the very best, no one else comes close, man...
I’ll keep on working for that minimum wage, I’m-
Bag boy
With my clean black cap, and my apron flowing
Bag boy
Here all the time, they’re gonna build a shrine
Bag boy
Never long lines ‘cause of my quick pace
Bag boy
“Donuts are in six, next to the snack cakes!”
Bag boy
Bread never gets smashed, folks always applaudin’
Bag boy
I’ll carry your bags to where you are parked at
Bag boy
“I’ll see you next time”