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New Jersey Lifestyle
"New Jersey Lifestyle" by Sudden Death. From the 2002 album Fatal Accident Zone.
Podcasts - Comedy
Previous peak charts position #82
Previous peak charts position in subgenre #33
Tom Rockwell
June 10, 2004
MP3 3.2 MB
128 kbps bitrate
0:00 minutes
Story behind the song
For years New Jersey has been the butt of many jokes. Having lived there for several years now I can tell you first hand they deserve it. I actually have a neighbor who washes his driveway every day with soap. First he hoses it down. Then he takes a scrub brush, dips it in a bucket of water, and scrubs his driveway. Then he rinses it off. I've never seen anything like it.
Yeah, Jersey baby! Welcome to Jersey, ya heard? Yeah, uh! Can't even pump your own gas here! Yo, yeah yeah, yo... I live alone in the armpit of the nation In the state with the densest population The Garden State, where the gardener wrecks it I tell people where I live by the exit Joisey, where hygene's secondary If the locals ever saw a real book they'd commit Hari Kari Neon glow car, chain around the license plate Two inches off of the ground, it's like a rollerskate Me and my neighbors play a game whenever we're at Baskin Robbins, seein' who can count the most flavors A-yo, if you're looking for class you're outta luck The state symbol is Calvin urinating on a Ford truck Muscle shirts are considered formal attire My neighbor's hobby is to sit for hours watching the drier And at the strip club, is the bride of Frankenstein With a back so hairy that it's a crime Before you visit that park you best be insured Everyone I know has come back severely injured Don't look at me 'cause it's out of my control People disappear for years in our massive pot holes, whoa [chorus] Ya'll wanna live my lifestyle Never had a job, never seen a dentist Wanna hang with the boys, go to Wal-Mart Visit me and I'm-a show you inbred At least have the state has major brain damage You'll get the same replies talking to a ham sandwich My next door neighbor only bathes on a Friday But every single day he uses soap to wash his driveway That's why the first week in July as we speak Is National Be Nice To New Jersey Week God help you if you wanna turn left, you have to be deft Usually you have to make three rights to go left And get this, if you take the folks on my street And add 'em up maybe you could get a full set of teeth You wouldn't believe, but one of 'em forgot how to breathe, so much Hair in their nose you could make your own weave It's a last resort, where chickens can be child Support, and driving is a contact sport It's where malls are considered a shrine, I've lived here For three years, I'm fittin' in just fine It's a place where kids play the game Name Those Scents Where all the garbage gets recycled into lawn ornaments The nuts in my town all belong in the pound Even Smokey the bear said go 'head, burn it down, go on (chorus)
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