Lyrics
Lead Vocals: David Heline Jr.
They're always finding new things,
To stick in my hair,
Even teachers in hallways,
Tug my underwear,
When I try to make friends,
I end up in the mud,
And everytime I sit down I hear,
Where's the flood,
Maybe I'm just lacking in my self-esteem,
Or I'm not using enough Brylcreem,
I'm known in the hallways as the dork in jeans,
Their punches usually destroy my spleen,
The swirlies happen in the bathroom stall,
When I get tripped, I hear come back next fall,
Attacked by the glee club and the chorus too,
At the end of the day, I'm just black and blue,
Everyone's always raving,
About the hip-hop,
For show and tell one time,
I brought a riding crop,
Timberland boots to me,
Went out of style last year,
But they still have a way of lodging,
Themselves in my rear,
Think I might drop out and get my G.E.D.,
I'll stay home all day and play D & D,
(Stay home all day and play D & D),
I'm always referred to as the dork in jeans,
My diet consists of juicy collard greens,
(My diet consists of collard greens),
I proudly buy sweaters from the store J. Crew,
I listen to Hanson, ABBA, and WHAM! too,
I'm perfectly content with the guy I am,
Forget pork and beans I want green eggs and ham,
It's not fair,
I'm so square,
It's not fair, I'm so square, I'm so square,
I don't care,
Five years later now, my life is just stellar,
My self-help book was a bestseller,
(Self-help book was a bestseller),
I'm known the world over as the dork in jeans,
My new found stardom is a cash machine,
(My new found stardom is),
When promoting my book I'm always polite,
I deny rumors of sex tapes with socialites,
My pride has been restored back on my shelf,
I'm glad I was no one but just myself...
