If you do not like Christian songs then this one is probably a song that you will not like. It is about rebellion against God, and being a dweeb in many ways.
hiphop
rap
beats
christian
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bowtie
hawaiian shirt
obnoxious
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Story behind the song
This song is about failing God and serving my own purposes and in general being a big rebel. I think I listened to John Reuben for a full 48 hours before I wrote it.
Lyrics
Flashback to yesterday, a great example of a day
When you weren’t on my mind and I did things my way.
Flashback to last year, and you’ll get
A whole lot more time, but the same old effect.
I’ve put you off again for another future date,
In favor of pursuing everything I hate.
And in the meantime, while I’m off serving myself,
You’ll be expected to solve all my problems from your shelf.
I spend more time trying to look like I follow you
Than I do actually doing any follow-through.
And that’s still not a lot of time, you’ve been disregarded
So long, it’s hard to tell that you haven’t been discarded.
This is the way that I’ve chosen to live.
This is the time and energy that I give,
Yet without fail, every single time I feel wronged,
I point at you, and tell you you’re not doing your job.
This is the reason I feel pain.
Let me fix this my own way.
Chorus:
I live to give myself what I want.
If you were anyone else, I’d warn you to stay away from me.
I know everything that you’ve done,
But that’s not gonna change my faithful adherence to my egocentricity.
(chorus 2)
I’m tired of chasing things that don’t fill,
I’ve told myself so many lies, I’m hardly trying anymore.
As I see my own foolishness, and lose my will,
Be there to take me in, and give me what I’m really starving for.
Verse 2
Flashback to never, the only time I ever
Put your will ahead of mine that I remember.
It’s a time where I wish I could go
But not strongly enough to make it so.
It’s funny how we as humans think we know better
When faced with the mind behind all energy and matter.
It’s funny we expect you to obey our commands,
It’s true your nature’s something that we don’t understand.
Trying to manipulate the omnipotent,
Is like trying to move a hundred ton boulder, only different
Like, as in the same, except the mass is infinite,
And somehow we believe that we’re succeeding in lifting it.
It’s funny how we seek to control,
And put a giant square peg into a tiny round hole.
When I say funny, I mean sad and pathetic,
‘cause I can’t force a laugh when I myself don’t seem to get it.
Verse 3
I’ve devoted so much time to having my way,
It’s obvious who I really serve,
And I keep on expecting to keep you at bay
By throwing you a lot of hollow words.
This is insanity, when confronted with divinity
To make our own requirements of what it’s for.
It’s the ultimate vanity to receive infinity,
And turn up our noses expecting more.
I’ve been given eternity,
And I still won’t relax my grip on mere years.
Every instruction that you’ve left in your word for me
Falls on unhearing, unwilling ears.
Yet patiently, you hold me all the same,
And I’m ashamed to say, I’ll struggle ‘til the day
When I finally put an end to this game,
And genuinely give myself away.
I’ve been given eternity,
And I still won’t relax my grip on mere years.
Every instruction that you’ve left in your word for me
Falls on unhearing, unwilling ears.
Yet patiently, you hold me all the same,
And I’m ashamed to say, I’ll struggle ‘til the day
When I finally put an end to this game,
And genuinely give myself away.