imlykabrd
my heart
Aug 5, 2010
i could give myself to the world but not to one person
i could love earth & humanity but not one man
this too-deep heart, who could fill?
when the world shuns me, who will i run to to nurse my wounds?
i would cradle myself and quiet my pain in the dark silence
i would call to my God who made this too-deep heart
in as much love it could hold, it could hold pain
this too-scarred heart, who could heal?
when the end of my life nears, who will visit my bed?
i would close my eyes and see the days of my too-deep heart
and the nights of my too-scarred heart
and fade away
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September
Sep 9, 2009
It's been awhile since my last post. The last 4 months have been intense - both at work and with my personal issues. Music kept me company, even taking the words out of my mouth when there was too much to say for me to speak. God sustains me through my struggles even as I break His rules. It seems I will be a rebel all my life - hurting those who love me to try and prove to myself how much they do... if they fail my test, they are frauds... and makes my belief that no one will ever truly love me all the more strong... but what prize goes to the winner?
Dredging up my past, what I went through as a child was at best therapeutic and made me realize what would make me happy in this life... at worst, I realized that the price of the happiness I seek was the happiness of other people... not wishing to hurt anyone, I kept it to myself, choosing to suffer in silence but like a poison, my misery touches everything I do even when I try hard not to let it. I have to make a clear-cut choice. I cannot vacillate any longer - pursue my happiness or sacrifice it for their happiness. Which is more noble? Which would earn me points in heaven? Which decision could I stick to in the long run? Could I be happy at the expense of other people's misery? Is freedom worth it? Is happiness worth generations of blame? Am I afraid to realize that I'm a good person after all? That I am capable of sacrifice? That I don't have the selfish gene after all. Am I simply being who other people want me to be? The hero, the saviour, the good girl. Will I ever be happy? Or am I meant for a life of misery?
O September, let me see the end of you.
As the leaves fall and the light of day leaves,
fly me to light when the calm waters reflect the sky.
Still me, shine through me Fall's sun that Winter may not freeze my heart.
Or take me, if I were to make a grave mistake, to the end of the path.
If I should die a coward, rather than a pallbearer.
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I Miss You
Apr 20, 2009
I saw you today
I didn't even know it was you
Until I made out the lines of your back, your silhouette
A guitar slung on your right shoulder
A bag on the other
It was an unexpected surprise
after a long day at work
I kept my distance
As you turned the corner, I wanted to say I miss you sometimes...
This song by Incubus just came to mind --
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You do something to me that I can't explain.
So would I be out of line if I said,
I miss you.
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I know I'll see you again
whether far or soon.
But I need you to know that I care
and I miss you.
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City Music on Sale
Mar 28, 2009
Vox amps & pedals (up to 55% off): 160 - 495 (amps), 140 - 185 (pedals)
Korg synthesizer, recording (up to 50% off): 3815 (synthesizer), 1100 (recording)
Line6 amps, USB interfaces (up to 60% off): 515 - 615 (amps), 90 - 465 (USB)
Zoom amp modeler (up to 80% off): 50
Hartke bass amps (up to 40% off): 225 - 550
Wharfedale Pro mixers (up to 30% off): 350 - 845
Martin & Co. acoustic guitar (up to 30% off): 1135
Ovation acoustic guitar (up to 45% off): 1825 - 2205
Hamer electric guitar (up to 40% off): 2795
Mackie mixers (up to 40% off): 332 - 804
1 Sophia Rd, #02-12/13, Peace Centre
Tel: 63377058
https://www.citymusic.com.sg
Operating hours: Mon-Sat: 10am to 7pm, closed on Sundays and Public Holidays
This is FYI only. I am not affiliated with City Music thus for inquiries, please contact them directly.
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