What more is there to say ? I suck, and often times I'll produce a track that doesn't fit in with an album or project, so they wind up here for all to ridicule. I don't think they're necessarily bad, sometimes too cheesy or a tad unpolished, but if a tune is really bad I simply don't bother the world with it. Big Music pollutes the industry enough as it is.
I was born. I got a Casio VL-Tone when I was a little kiddie, and I still have it. Today I can play any instrument that has a "Demo" button.
Seriously though, I'm a computer programmer, and in my teens I wrote my own software to produce synthesized music. Now 15 years later I just use the commercial tools, partly because I'm lazy, and partly because 15 years of drugs and alcohol have severely crippled my ability to design software, but mostly the laziness. Kids: don't do drugs! You're ruining it for us has-beens!
I only play dead.
Kraftwerk (yeah yeah, everyone says that)
Nine Inch Nails
Pet Shop Boys
Hardware: All computer-based... two tasty Intel Quad-Core systems at 3.6ghz, 8gb ram, 6 TB disk (total), M-Audio Audiophile 2496, M-Audio Radium 49 keyboard, Behringer mixer, some cheap Chinese imitation mic and M-Audio BX8a Deluxe monitors.
Software: Reason, Cubase, a ridiculously huge collection of sounds and loops spanning over 600gb collected over 15 years.
I was repeatedly shaved against my will by Michael Jackson's monkey.