I have no idea what to write in this box, but I'm assuming no one will read it anyway, so I might as well type some potentially fascinating jibberish. I was born in a hospital but quickly re-located to an apartment in the middle of Germantown, Philadelphia where I spent the first three years of my life. I was a bad kid who threw constant hissyfits, so I was frequently "cruisin' for a bruiser." I had a three-foot-tall teddy bear until I was 19 years old. I named him Pink Bear. How original. My dead grandfather gave it to me when I was 3. Actually, all my grandparents are dead now, but this one died when I was 5. I got my wisdom teeth pulled 17 years later and dreamt I was taking a rollercoaster tour of the human body with my co-workers.

When I was eight years old, I shaved my eyebrows off before church. My dad always shaved before church, and I wanted to be grown up, too. My mom was less than thrilled and frantically drew my eyebrows in with an eyeliner pencil before we rushed out. I threw a pencil at my teacher in fifth grade. In first grade, I kicked my computer lab teacher because I thought she was ugly. I missed recess for a whole week because of that. I also missed recess for chasing boys around the playground... and pinching their butts. I didn't know any better. I promise.

I ran out of room now. Oh! I have ADHD and probably did a good job of representing that...