Most blues songs start out: "I woke up this morning" or "I got a good woman"...Not good unless you add something nasty in the next line like "With the meanest dog in town. Blues cars are Chevys,Fords, Old Caddillacs. Blues don't travel in Volvo's or BMW's or sport utility vehicles. Blues do travel on Buses and southbound Trains! You can have the Blues in Chicago or Memphis but not on Sanibel Island or Disneyland or Hawaii. You can't have the blues take place in a shopping mall or Starbucks, go out in the parking lot or better yet back behind in the alley where the trash cans are. Good places are the Highway, the Jail, the empty bed, Bottom of a whiskey bottle. Bad places are golf courses, gallery openings or Ivy league institutions. Do you have the right to have the blues? Yes if you shot a man in Memphis or you can't be satisfied, but not if you have all of your teeth and were once blind and can see again through modern surgery. Blues drinks are cheap wine, Whiskey, muddy water. Not Perrier, Pilsner or Dr Pepper. If death occurs in a cheap motel or an electric chair or a train track that's great! But in no way should death occur from liposuction or fatigue at a tennis match. Blues names for women are Sadie, Big Momma or Louise. Good names for men are Joe C. Willie B or Lightning. The names Amber Susie or Heather should never be used no matter how many men they gunned down in Memphis. So keep in mind no matter how sad and tragic your life is you shouldn't be singing the blues if you own a Blackberry or drive a Hummer!