Tollbooths, jug-handles, road rage, rubernecking delays... AAARRGHH! This funny country number was aired recently on National Public Radio's "Car Talk" show.

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Being a Jersey driver for 13 years, I've had plenty of time to live it. But, when my parents turned me on to the "Car Talk" show on National Public Radio, they convinced me to try my hand at a driving song that could be part of the show. I thought it was a fun challenge. This one took quite a while, until I could think of words that were both funny and had the right flow.

My wife Amy suggested all the sound effects that jump out at you during the song. I hope you have as much fun listening to it as we had putting it together!

There goes the diner
In the left-hand lane
Cross that divider
Aint that a pain?

Now Ive gotta go three miles east just to come back west
Man, this puts my patience to the test

You cant get there from here in Jersey
Youre always on the wrong side of the road
You cant get there from here in Jersey
Ive got a case of jug handle turnaround overload

Bumper-to-bumper
Aint this a wreck?
That fender bender
Them rubber necks

Now Ive gotta wait half-hour more just to get a mile
Man, this puts them cramps into my style

You cant get there from here in Jersey
Youre always on the side that doesnt move
You cant get there from here in Jersey
Till you get off, no way the traffic will improve

Im going crazy
In my steel cage
This roadway madness
Is all the rage

I can kiss the exit lane goodbye
Theyd sooner crash than let you by

You cant get there from here in Jersey
Youre always far from where you need to be
You cant get there from here in Jersey
Ill be home by tomorrow, no use waitin up for me

There goes my exit
And Im running late
Im going in circles
Around this state

Now Ive gotta go ten miles north just to come back south
Man, this leaves a bad taste in my mouth

You cant get there from here in Jersey
Youre always on the wrong side of the way
You cant get there from here in Jersey
No U-turn here, Id better find a place to stay

You cant get there from here in Jersey
Ive been too long behind this plexi-glass
You cant get there from here in Jersey
Hey there buddy, you can kiss my E-Z-Pass