An incredibly stupid song about the blessed yellow maze-dwelling ghost eater who brings me such joy.

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I'm obsessed with Pac-Man. When I'm not working or doing this stupid comedy synth-punk thing, I run a website called "The First Church Of Pac-Man" and try to get my Pac-Man memorabilia collection looking all impressive-like. It's not so much that I want to WORSHIP the wonderous yellow one whose roundness inspires us all, it's just that I really really friggin' LIKE Pac-Man, and I wish my enemies were blue and edible too. Written with my friend and fellow Pac-Man follower Jeff "Pac-Manic" Carter.

(Okay, you hear the sound! The sound is PAC-MAN! Are you ready for PAC-MAN?)
(I am ready for Pac-Man!) (Yes, it is Pac-Man!) (Okay, Pac-Man!) (It is time to go!)

Being round a yellow guy? PAC-MAN!
Do he eating lots of dots? PAC-MAN!
Running up and down your street,
Screaming at your mailbox now,
Hanging from your ceiling fan? PAC-MAN!

(Yay! It is Pac-Man!) (Time for a Pac-Man!)
(We are very liking Pac-Man!) (Hooray now for the Pac-Man!)
(Much happy has this Pac-Man!) (Do I sing again about Pac-Man? Okay!)

Mouth a open and a close? PAC-MAN!
Run your fingers on my arm! PAC-MAN!
Jumping up and down real fast,
Putting butter in your hat,
Shaving all your fish at night? PAC-MAN!

(Ohh….)

It's time to Pac-Man!
The best way to Pac-Man is to use the game!
You moving joystick and you eat the dot,
Eat all the dot, you win another maze,
And mazes are the place where Pac-Man goes!
He eat a key or maybe eat a pear,
Cuz these are food for eating in the maze
But ghosts are making death so run away
Or make a blue ghost turn into a food!

(Oo, food! The Pac-Man likes food!)
(Lettuce is also food.)
(Do not talk about lettuce. It is time for Pac-Man.)
(More Pac-Man?)
(Yes, we will have another Pac-Man!)
(Okay, Pac-Man!)
(Where is Pac-Man?)
(Pac-Man is NOW!)

Eat a dot and eat a fruit? PAC-MAN!
Leaving something on the stove? PAC-MAN!
Spinning on a countertop,
Sniffing all your laundry now,
Blinky and Inky feeling rather sheepish? PAC-MAN!

(ohhhh…)

(Pac-Man!) (Pac-Man?) (Mmm ohh, Pac-Man!)
(There is no more song now!)