(See above for thorough explanation)

I don't play live, and any time I'm making music is a special moment to me.

(No comment.)

I have to review the contrast prior to sealing my musical career with a signature.

BIOGRAPHY:

I know it's not conventional to speak about myself as an artist in the first-person. Absolutely every musician/music producers I know does it in third person, though I never figured out why. I like making it personable, so please bear with me. So where does my music come from? Here goes:

19 - Melodic Euphoria. My first attempt at expressing myself through music. At the time I was highly impressionable and easily seduced by glittering glamor, fairy tale adventures, and making grand and romantic imageries about the human things in life. At this point of the game, I dreamed about what it'll be like to live a grand and glamorous life instead of actually living my life.

20 - Lady Lament. Instead of living my life as a normal girl growing up, I spent much time imagining what it must be like to have a normal life. It didn't take me long to realize I didn't have what it takes to write. As the name implies, I was melancholic and unhappy, and I lamented the limits to my imagination. My inspiration was lacking because my life was lacking. I had nothing of substance to write about.

21 - Necromantrix. Almost the same story, with trivial variations not worth mentioning. I tried to leave my pretense and start to write more honestly, but didn't have the courage or the humility. So instead of being sincere with the lyrics I write about, once again I fell into the trap of creating images and hide behind a bland facade. Superficiality at its worst...

22 (aka now) - many aliases later, I snapped out of my delusions of grandeur and came to terms with myself, with the fact that I have tried to be every character I come across to escape the things about myself that scared me and made me feel small and inadequate in my own eyes. Some things were painful to admit, but the more I tried to stay true to who I actually am (instead of who I wanted to be), the better I feel about myself, and the more confident I became - My first step towards self acceptance, and I awakened to the real world. I'm not more realistic about my idealistic notions and understood better what it means to be human. There are many things that I've yet to figure out, but I'm no longer afraid or harbor the need make apologies for the way I am.

So now I have a massive turning point in my musical directions. I am working on my EP for ICONOCLAST, my new project. ICONOCLAST is an image breaker, a rebel. Someone who scorns norms and social conventions. It's an attitude that I don't necessarily identify with, but it's easy to write ICONOCLAST because I have several people (Iconoclasts, if you will) to draw inspiration from. However, I realized the irony of it - "extreme degree of noncomformity is essentially conformity; by reacting to social norms and going in the opposite direction, you're still letting said norms dictate your own behavior". What a twist, huh? It's not exactly a new concept. Thinking about it - in creating ICONOCLAST, I am STILL trying to create an appealing image. ICONOCLAST - the image breaker - hiding behind a facade. (Hence the irony.)

Then suddenly it dawned on me! I am gradually going in the right direction with my music, but I had it backwards. For the longest time I thought it only counts when you make art for yourself alone, since ideally that's the honest/nonpretentious way of going about it (otherwise it'll seem too much like you're trying to sell, which seems like a manipulative intent that nobody takes kindly to). However, I am just one person, one voice, and one voice isn't big enough to be heard by all. Sure, I can make music for myself, and I'm pleased that I can express myself musically. But lately I've met some interesting character in my life that made me fall in love with people in general. I've always known that "everybody have a story to tell", yet this idealistic concept never really hit me in reality, until I've actually met some people who DID have hell of a story to tell. (Again, what a twist!) That's when I started to see the communicative potential in my music. That's when I started to have real substance to the lyrics I write, because I'm not seeing the world through my own limited perspective. I can take on other perspectives. My music can act as the voice of all these people I meet, speak for them when nobody else is listening. As soon as I started writing music for other people, I now found unlimited source of inspirations to draw from. It also helped me be true to myself as an artist as I realize that people are as human as I am - there's no reason to be ashamed. Being connected to the rest of the world makes me want to share things about myself when I previously couldn't find the courage to do so, now that I know I'm not alone and that everyone can relate to everyone elses' story. It sounds corny, but there's a little bit of everybody in everybody. There's always someone who's willing to receive you if you can reach out.

So, if you'd like your story to be heard, feel free to send it (anonymously, if you're more comfortable that way) to my email.

Progressive Rock/Metal, most notably Opeth and Porcupine Tree.

Contact information:

My email: melodic (dot) euphoria (at) gmail (dot) com.

Livejournal: melodiceuphoria.livejournal.com

Facebook:
http://uottawa.facebook.com/profile.php?id=121503966

If you're interested in a collab, discussing philosophical ideas or the latest news on psychological research, I'm game. Hit me up.