It's not a band name, it's my actual name, believe it or not. Some guy already lucked into Ace Frehley, and my second choice, Peter Cetera was also already nabbed. Ah well.

I play live in apartments, furnace rooms, and hot dog stands of the greater Pittsburgh area. I have to say it brings me great joy to rock out in front of a couple or family smashed on Hi-C and Mott's apple juice. My most special moment when performing live was when I was mistaken for both Lawrence Welk and Robert Goulet in the same night!

The internet has changed the music industry by allowing some of the worst recordings ever created to finally be heard by millions of people. It's a real dream come true.

Certainly. As long as they understood that the wallpaper in the recording studio should always induce vertigo or vomiting when I am laying down some hot new tracks!

I've been making music since my high school days. I had a lousy band back then called The Penguin Project that you don't really want to know about. Our big hit was "Communist Toilet". From there, I left the drums behind and picked up the guitar. The guitar tried to run away, but soon I mastered the Mel Bay EZ Chord Songbook and was wowing my parents and pets with songs such as "Old MacDonald" and "Three Blind Mice". Ever since then, I've been rocking out for Cheez Nips and cream soda.

The guy who plays the accordion every weekend down in front of Wholey's market in the Strip District of Pittsburgh.

The strange little Indian room in the Cincinnati art museum.

I use a various assortment of organic and electronic devices. You know, a guitar, a computer, a keyboard, some cheesy effects, anything to make me sound like the next Frankie Valli or Jack Wagner.

"Two Doors Down" by Dolly Parton is a song everyone should try to cover. A whole cover album of that song would be killer.