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Eviscerated Zombie Tampon
NEWS   Eviscerated Zombie Tampon has risen from the ashes and will be touring July-August 2013.
I F*cked My Neighbor's Cat (Just To See The Expres
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Over the top, comedy infused punk/noisecore/weirdcore band, based in Tampa, Fl.
Performances are free-form improvisation, with no traditional song structure, with titles (and occasionally actual songs) which brutally mock current events and beliefs
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play lo-fi play hi-fi  Anti-Music Assraping of Anything Musical
play lo-fi play hi-fi  Lars Ulrich Sucks Corporate Cock
play lo-fi play hi-fi  I F#cked My Neighbor's Cat...
play lo-fi play hi-fi  Cock- The Real Passion of Christ
play lo-fi play hi-fi  I Want to Join Judas Priest
play lo-fi play hi-fi  I Dug Up Grandma and F***ed Her in the Eye Socket
play lo-fi play hi-fi  Licking Rotten Cheese from Rosie O'Donnel's Ass
play lo-fi play hi-fi  World's Biggest Barbecue
play lo-fi play hi-fi  I Hate You...You Suck Balls, You Faggots
play lo-fi play hi-fi  Let's Enroll in Columbine (and Finish the Job)
Eviscerated Zombie Tampon (EZT) is a punk/noisecore band based in Tampa, Florida.

EZT are 100% politically incorrect and reserve the right to insult, ridicule, annoy, and piss on anything (or anyone) who get on our nerves.

If you don't like it, tough shit!

If you don't like our music, f*** YOU!!

If you do like our music:
Seek psychiatric care!
Why this name?
Our name was chosen after a weekend of drugs, alcohol, and porn films.....
Do you play live?
Our live shows are infamous and impossible to describe....insanity with a musical backdrop.....
How, do you think, does the internet (or mp3) change the music industry?
It gives worthy bands a way to be heard and helps people avoid shitty releases too, like Metallishit's St Anger....
Would you sign a record contract with a major label?
We are currently signed by Splattergod Records
And a bunch of bootlegged crap too....
Band History:
Eviscerated Zombie Tampon (EZT) was conceived one evening during the summer of 2003 following a week of consuming mass quantities of drugs and alcohol.

Completely annoyed about the state of the current underground scene (and pretty much everything else) Sir Nekro Cuntsplitter and Pussymaggot Bootylicious decided to join forces and unleash the most vile, retarded, over -the- top form of blur/grind that the world had ever heard.

Ignoring the fact that neither of them had any musical ability, talent or experience, they began to seek out like minded (other assholes) people who shared their vision of aural chaos.

1st to be contacted was Josh Maggotruin. After forcing him to ingest a shitload of roofies and taking pictures of him with farm animals, he was blackmailed into joining the band.

Next to be "coerced" into joining was Pete DeMaio. After promising him riches, drugs, and hookers, he was tricked into signing a 50 year contract as EZT's guitarist.

Next to come along was one of Tampa's most reknowned assholes, "Moshing" Martin Manley. As he had no experience/ability to play any instrument, he was immediately given the bass guitar position.

It was about this time that Sir Nekro Cuntsplitter was kidnapped by a perverted, sex crazed lunatic by the name of Black Wydow who proceeded to sexually assault him for a month straight with objects better left undiscussed.

She was eventually offered the positions of keyboardist and second drummer, as she has shown herself to be more than capable of handling big sticks. In exchange for being allowed to join the band, she promised to free Sir Nekro 1 weekday a month, to recuperate.

Spacey King Cosmo III, never a true member of the band, was a last minute addition who filled in for Pete during EZT's debut live performance. The band decided he had to go mainly due to his bizarre obsession with Michael Jackson's monkey, "Bubbles" (don't ask)

Unfortunately, Josh was no longer able to commit to the riggers of being in EZT and was replaced by Baron von Queefhuffer, formerly of the boy band, Anal Pleasures. After deep meditation, or an overdose of prescription pain medication, "Moshin" Martin Manley has re-awoken and christened himself as Muhamed Faahk Yeumahma. Since Pete was/is incapable of showing up for gigs due to his his full-time job as a Men's Bath House Attendant, he was replaced by axe-assassin Buster f***in Highman, best known for his defiling of Mother Theresa's corpse with a bronze-plated dildo.

Following the infamous "Olson Twins tribute" show, both Yemahma and Queefhuffer relocated to Jacksonville, FL and formed Queefhuffer, and exited EZT in the process.

To compound things, Buster ended up MIA, (though rumored to have gotten a gig as Rickey Martin's backup dancer) thus EZT was faced with the decision to carry on or not....

Knowing that the music scene was hopeful for us to call it quits, we decided to forge on ahead.... So they enlisted Jimmy Shitfield (Bass), Dave Mudstain (guitar) and Harry Rectum (drums) This line-up was now as stable as a 3-legged table along the California fault line

EZT soon reemerged, more obnoxious than ever, opening for Hallows Eve and Paths of Possession during the 2nd Lowlife festival, in 2004

EZT went on to play one more live gig, in 2005, when Sir Nekro was attacked by some psycho bi*** during EZT's set. Though no one was seriously injured, the band decided to take a break from performing, though not ruling out a possible future live show or two...

Jimmy Shitfield and Dave Mudstain went on to form Vomiting Rectum, and harry joined up with, first Contorted, and most recently, Lethal Prayer.

Fast forward to 2012; Sir Nekro and Black Wydow part ways, both personally and professionally, leaving Sir Nekro and Pussymaggot, once again, as the lone members of EZT...F*** 'em!

We are currently smoking a lot of weed and thinking about releasing another CD, DVD, or whatever format we can afford.... And some crappy splits with other shitty bands... We still have some unreleased crap in the can, so it's possible that another EZT release may soon be puked out..
Though we're sure no one probably gives a shit.....

Fast forward o April 2nd 2013; Scott "Pussymaggot Bootylicious" Valentino is killed in a car accident.
His family urge EZT to continue SN and PMB's plans, so Sir Nekro goes forward with EZT.

Enter Xerxes Grimm into the picture. A huge supporter and collaboration to be, (from Nekrophalik and Fetus Omelet) he was the one who convinced EZT to reform in the first place. Initially for a split, then a show...which snowballed into a 2 week tour. A tour which takes place beginning July 26th (so far)..
Your influences?
GG Allin, Murder Junkies, Wayne Newton, Frank Sinatra, Stryper, Anal Cunt, Jesus and the Nail Knockers, Gwar, etc
Favorite spot?
Tampa F***in' Florida, birthplace of death metal...
Equipment used:
Stolen.....
Anything else...?
If we've hurt your feelings.......................................
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Good
Good Head is Hard to Find
Fuck Easter
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