Leaving A Stoner
Author: Leo Roberts (with snatches of Kris Drever)
Oh, B**ger, it's in Dadgad, can I put it into standard?
I'm not as young as you; I'm old enough to be your grandad.
I'm used to normal tuning but, if it will make you happy
I'll play with a metal plectrum then I'll do some tippy-tappy

Oh, B**ger, it's in DADGAD may I tune it back to normal?
I'd better ask permission though I try to stay informal
These complicated tunings simply do not work for me
I'm more comfy with a guitar tuned EADGBE

I can’t cope with modal tunings, normal tuning is familiar
I will sometimes play in dropped D cos the chord shapes are quite similar
But I can’t be bothered tuning more than one string to get DADGAD
It will soon go out of fashion it is just the latest trad fad

And it takes me half an hour to get my guitar in this tuning
And when I do I find it doesn’t compliment my crooning
So my guitar’s tuned quite normally it suits my boring voice
let the young kids play in DADGAD if they want to make that choice

Now I don’t have any power, and I’m certainly nor regal
But if I were put in charge then I would make DADGAD illegal
So, come the revolution, comrades, I would like to tell you all
That if you play in DADGAD you’ll be first against the wall.